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Kai Briggs

Joined: 7/2/2003

Quote: Sir Briggs
Knight of [dish soap]
Destroyer of Worlds


"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
- Revelation 21:4


 

For the newer members. 8/29/2005 5:57:10 AM

This is more or less, an updated guide to Essential Magic. Obviously, there will be quite a few older members who come in here, but that is just fine. I will tell you of the secret underworking of Essential Magic. There is a general consensus, though rarely mentioned, that it is rather rude and immature for the "flaming" of those new to the website. However, as mentioned, it is rarely brought up. The idea is that anyone who chooses to stay throughout all of the "flaming" will be someone who can take a joke and stick around. Most of the members here had to go through the same trials that you have.

And after choosing to stick around, and follow the basic guidelines of the website, have come to be respected. This is perfectly displayed in the case of Dragonlair who will from this point on be referred to as DL. DL was younger than most of the other members and unfortunately put no effort at all into constructing comprehensible posts. He was generally disliked for quite some time, but eventually, he was respected.

It is in fact with your greater interest in mind that the veterans of this site treat you as they do so often. Strider has always been this way, and always will, but fortunately, after you get 537 posts, you are officially allowed to call him a noob for posting threads about some experience he is most unhappy with or an AIM conversation. We all <3 Strider of course, but that does not stop a lot of us from complaining. At 602 posts, you are allowed to have an opinion, and you may express it.

I was of course kidding about the posts, but here are a list of the things to which many members do not enjoy:
-Making a thread titled "What is your favorite/the best X"
-Talking about Magic in the General Discussion Forum as most of the members do not play.
-Making a thread asking about how many girls play or are on this site. Though, for the record, about 8% of the MtG community are girls, and there are about 5 females that post at least once a month here.
-Disrespecting the veterans. (You do that after you have stuck around for a while)
-Bad grammar. This is one of the most important factors. If English is not your native language, it is suggested you say so.
-Posting in the wrong forum. Be sure to check the other forums so you can understand where to post other topics.
-Asking for deck ratings/complaining about the combo section.

Also there are some running jokes, and lines here at Essential Magic as well as some basic traditions and inside jokes.

eM Traditions
-Grapes, bagels, and cheese. It is tradition to welcome new members with something to the effect of "Welcome to eM and don't eat the grapes." Lately however, bagels have been added. Imagine the worst thing that a male can do to a bagel, and I believe you will understand what direction that is headed. Also, for some reason, many of the members here seem to be fond of cheese and often mention it.
-[dish soap]. This comes from the thread entitled "It's all about the rebel" in which five members not so slyly avoided the censor by replacing any vulgar word with [dish soap]
-The Five. Though not mentioned often anymore, the first five active posters of "It's all about the rebel." are often referred to as such. They include, in no particular order, Iron Messiah, TackledJesus, Eroticles, Kemykal, and Kai Briggs. I suggest you read the first three or four pages of the Rebel thread to get a better understanding.
-The Thread. This is the thread of legend created by Duncan. It reached over 10,000 posts, and is hidden somewhere in eM that you must find without asking. It was a thread made for pretty much talking about your life and receiving comments and suggestions from other members.

I have without a doubt missed several important issues. I would suggest to you that you do not create a new thread until you have been around and understand how our little society works. An Introduction is always appreciated in which you give us some basic information about yourself. Well, forgive the lack of specification, but welcome to Essential Magic, do not eat the grapes, and if at all possible, avoid the bagels. I hope you enjoy your stay, and choose to stick around.





 

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spike109u
Bug Hunter

Joined: 1/8/2004

Quote: "No bird soars too high, if he flies with his own wings"

"Pi+e=Pie"
-Brave Fencer Musashi

"I put basic lands in my decks. That's tech."
-Strider

"ya, MTG is just like sex"
-Canadian

"C:\Dos
C:\Dos\Run
Run\Dos\Run"
-Sodaguy

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Random Comment 8/29/2005 1:15:52 PM

This should be a sticky. Great job on summarizing the site, Kai.

Sig created by: Mononoke86.

 

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Kai Briggs

Joined: 7/2/2003

Quote: Sir Briggs
Knight of [dish soap]
Destroyer of Worlds


"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
- Revelation 21:4


 

RE: Random Comment 8/29/2005 7:30:46 PM

Quoting spike109u:This should be a sticky. Great job on summarizing the site, Kai.


Speak of the devil.


 

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J-n-L
Bug Hunter

Joined: 4/17/2003

Quote: "To talent and illusion; to Rosie, to all we love"
-Water For Elephants


"I pretty much just listen in order to know when I can jump in with my own stuff to say"
-BonAFidE

 

Random Comment 8/29/2005 8:36:24 PM

*speaks of the devil*

that's called stage-directing, kids. if done wrong, can lead to serious misinterpretations that lead to death.

also, don't get mad or sad if you're called a "newb". it's when you're called a "n00b" that you should start to cry.

oh, and don't insult mexicans or canadians. you'd really get it in the butt if you do Happy




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Strider

Joined: 11/20/2002

Quote: eM's resident holier-than-thou purveyor of righteous fury since 2002.

 

RE: For the newer members. 8/30/2005 2:21:03 AM

Quoting Kai Briggs:It is in fact with your greater interest in mind that the veterans of this site treat you as they do so often. Strider has always been this way, and always will, but fortunately, after you get 537 posts, you are officially allowed to call him a noob for posting threads about some experience he is most unhappy with or an AIM conversation. We all <3 Strider of course, but that does not stop a lot of us from complaining. At 602 posts, you are allowed to have an opinion, and you may express it.


You know you don't love me! You've been after my family treasure since the beginning! Happy

But to make this thread useful, here is the link to the Wikipedia entry on eM, which gives a pretty thorough covering of how things work here.

Whatcha gonna do when the Hokemania runs wild on you?
My Tumblr account.

 

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duckie

Joined: 8/16/2003

Quote: Mr. Duckie, Esquire
Advisor of [dish soap]
Attorney at LOL

"All war is based on deception."

"Hold out baits to entice your enemy, then crush him."

-Sun Tzu

Zombie: are you heading, gay?
Danaon: where dongles?

 

Random Comment 8/30/2005 7:22:26 AM

Tread lightly.

 

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Elfie
Moderator

Joined: 8/3/2002

Quote: "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing"

- Edmund Burke

 

RE: For the newer members. 8/30/2005 6:00:03 PM

Quoting Kai Briggs:fortunately, after you get 537 posts, you are officially allowed to call him a noob for posting threads about some experience he is most unhappy with or an AIM conversation ... At 602 posts, you are allowed to have an opinion, and you may express it.


I was the test subject that established these principles. The project was know as "The Elfie Perogative", and is currently pending for full declassification.

eMmies 2010: Best Mod
eMmies 2009: Nicest Member, Best Mod, Most Informative Member
eMmies 2008: Most Likely to be Assassinated for Political Reasons
eMmies 2006: Best Mod, Most Politically Active
eMmies 2005: Nicest Member, Most Politically Active
eMmies 2003: Best Newbie

 

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vilbe

Joined: 7/22/2002

Quote: IV/XX The Offical eM Herbal Beneficary Sir Vilbe Lord of [dish soap] Sustainer of the Keg Garden http://www.thedamagedone.org

 

RE: RE: For the newer members. 9/8/2005 12:24:31 AM

lets still not forget the basis of eM. to have fun and be yourself. it just so happens everyone on this website has one thing in common, a common hobby, magic, that we cared for enough, to join a website about it. we're die-hards.



also remember, lots of us are highly sarcastic...

 

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ValorsDream

Joined: 12/15/2003

Quote: ZombieSwordfish
-You can't force total chaos, nublet.
Me
-I'm half way there.
bonZai
-*Screeches*

Me
-How is this for a rhetorical question?
Badger of Aisa!
-Damn good.

Super callused, extra fragile mystic hexed with halitosis.

 

RE: RE: RE: For the newer members. 9/9/2005 2:02:05 AM

Quoting vilbe:lets still not forget the basis of eM. to have fun and be yourself. it just so happens everyone on this website has one thing in common, a common hobby, magic, that we cared for enough, to join a website about it. we're die-hards.



also remember, lots of us are highly sarcastic...


Sarcasm is our middle name.[/sarcasm itself]
______________________________________________Sig below this line_____________________
Need tips for unique legacy deck

 

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Heretic

Joined: 1/21/2003

Quote: Take me for one last ride

I'm out of my head

 

Random Comment 9/10/2005 4:36:40 AM

Stickying this would have been just as good

Sextape////||||\\\\You've Seen The Butcher

Rocket Skates (Director's Cut)////||||\\\\Diamond Eyes

 

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Deathworks

Joined: 8/13/2002

Quote: "The irony in this statement is like a LARGE TEXT HAMMER to the face."
-Strider

 

Random Comment 9/10/2005 11:43:08 PM

Why don't we lock this?

Official Member of the eM Hall of Fame: Art Department

 

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greenmaster
Bug Hunter

Joined: 2/27/2003

Quote: "Yet held it more humane, more heav'nly first
By winning words to conquer willing hearts,
And make persuasion do the work of fear;"
-Milton, Paradise Regained

 

RE: Random Comment 9/11/2005 1:56:13 AM

Quoting Deathworks:Why don't we lock this?


In Soviet Russia, the thread locks YOU

-
-
scrutinising the steel

 

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Elfie
Moderator

Joined: 8/3/2002

Quote: "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing"

- Edmund Burke

 

RE: Random Comment 9/11/2005 3:49:01 AM

Quoting Deathworks:Why don't we lock this?


I'm not done having my fun yet. That's why.

eMmies 2010: Best Mod
eMmies 2009: Nicest Member, Best Mod, Most Informative Member
eMmies 2008: Most Likely to be Assassinated for Political Reasons
eMmies 2006: Best Mod, Most Politically Active
eMmies 2005: Nicest Member, Most Politically Active
eMmies 2003: Best Newbie

 

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Isildur9473

Joined: 9/17/2003

Quote: "You made me think about a Doom-themed porn movie."
-Genocide Heart

"But then again, bro's before ho's."
-Sodaguy

"NOO ETHAN, DUMP THAT B!TCH!!! SHE's PREGNANT WITH YOUR DAD's SON!!!!!"
-Tetsujin

AIM: Isildur9473

 

RE: Random Comment 9/12/2005 4:24:37 AM

Quoting Heretic:Stickying this would have been just as good


OMFG Steam r0x0rz teh big111!


WSS
Trade Thread

 

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Archivist

Joined: 3/25/2002

Quote: "Perception is reality" ~ Foxfire

 

Random Comment 9/12/2005 4:18:11 PM

w00t! Last post on first page!!!

I eMmortalized!

 

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